Don't Bet Against It.

Many people, far more knowledgeable and experienced than I, have explained to me in recent weeks that the Fourth Round Proper of the FA Vase is when the competition really catches the imagination with fans. From this round on, ties are no longer regionalised, attendances will rise as will hopes, dreams and expectations. As 2008 draws to a close, we are now down to the last 32 teams and the relative few still standing must feel they now face a realistic chance of walking out onto the Wembley turf in May 2009.


But who are the favourites to lift the trophy? One thing is for sure, I can't tell you. I've absolutely no idea. Many of the teams still in the competition I have barely heard of; others I am slowly starting to recognise. Last season's finalists are holding onto their dream of yet another day at Wembley. In the next round, the holders, AFC Fylde (formerly Kirkham & Wesham) face a tricky journey to Needham Market in what will be, on January 17th, a repeat of last years' Semi-Final. The beaten finalists last May were Lowestoft, and they will host Witney United.

In the betting markets, there is only one bookmaker laying odds for the FA Vase. SkyBet do not, rather surprisingly, have AFC Fylde installed as favourites. That honour goes jointly to three teams, namely VT FC, Leiston and Lowestoft (odds 10/1) whilst AFC Fylde are slightly longer odds to retain the trophy (12/1). I can understand why Leiston are up there - they had a great FA Cup campaign this season, and Lowestoft. But VT FC? Who are they?

I guess the bookmaker can only derive odds based on League position and recent FA Vase history; I doubt that anyone at SkyBet has a detailed understanding of any of these non League clubs. VT FC are actually based near Southampton and in case you are wondering (I had to look this up) VT stands for Vosper Thornycroft, the name of a public limited shipbuilding and engineering company. VT is essentially a work's team. There you go - that is the one thing I have learnt today. As for their FA Vase pedigree, this is the first time they have reached the Fourth Round Proper. They are third in the Wessex League Premier Division having lost only one League game this season, and as a Step 5 team on the pyramid VT are therefore one of the highest ranked teams still in the competition. Joint favourite kind of makes sense then.

Down at the other end of the pecking order are FC Clacton and Stone Dominoes. Both are Step 6 clubs and currently lie mid-table in their Leagues, the Eastern Counties League Division One and the North West Counties League Division One respectively. At odds of 66/1 they are not fancied. But could they be worth a punt?

In the FA Vase, League position and ranking in the pyramid seem to mean little. When AFC Fylde won the competition last season, they were one of the lowest ranked teams competing. Last season was their first time in the competition and they entered at the earliest stage (First Round Qualifying). At this stage of the competition last year they were 66/1 outsiders. That alone is enough to suggest that any of the teams remaining have a chance to win it. Even FC Clacton or Stone Dominoes. You never know.

I am a crap tipster and usually lose any football bets I make, so if you are waiting for a tip, I'm afraid you are in for a long wait. All I know is that in a few weeks time, I will be at Bitton AFC (20/1) for their tie with Cogenhoe United (40/1). I have no idea who will win the game. However, there is a 1 in 16 chance that the winner of the FA Vase 2008-09 will come from that tie. Don't bet against it.

Merry Christmas Everyone!

I would just like to take this opportunity to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! I hope you get to see some great football over the festive period; in the meantime, I will leave you in the capable hands of these Worcester City fans and supporters. Enjoy!

Bitton AFC

One draw and two postponements later, Cogenhoe’s opponents in the Fourth Round Proper of the FA Vase are now known; they will travel to Bitton AFC after the Bristol side overcame Street on Wednesday evening. The teams failed in their second attempt to play their replay when it was called off last Saturday after torrential rains had saturated the South West. On Wednesday, the teams were still deadlocked 1-1 at 90 minutes, and it eventually took an extra-time goal from Bitton's Mark Reynolds to settle the tie.

So on January 17th, 2009, I will be off down the M4 to Bitton’s Recreation Ground. It will come as no surprise that it will be my first ever visit to Bitton.

I have struggled with my research on Bitton AFC; information about the club is sparse but I’m sure I will find out more during my trip. Up until the late 1980’s the club played in the local Bristol and District Football League with limited success. They were in the Senior Division in season 1989-90 and with two successive promotions they reached the Premier Division of the Bristol Premier Combination. In 1994-95 they won the Gloucestershire FA’s Senior Amateur Cup and finished in 2nd spot in the League. As a result they were promoted to the Gloucestershire County League. Two seasons later Bitton AFC finished runners-up in the Gloucestershire County League and were promoted to the Western League First Division. In 2003/2004 the club achieved its highest ever status, finishing runners-up in the Western League First Division with the reward of another promotion, this time to the Premier Division. This is where they remain to this day. Last season they finished 7th in the League.

Bitton AFC has relatively little FA Vase experience, having only competed in the competition since 2001-02. Their most successful season – to date - was in 2003-04 when they reached the Fifth Round Proper before losing 2-0 at Colne. This season they have seen off Poole Town and Street to get to this stage.

Their FA Cup experience is even more limited. They first entered in 2002-03 and have never progressed beyond the Qualifying Rounds. This season they were knocked out by Paulton Rovers in the Second Round Qualifying after disposing of Thame United, Bishop’s Cleeve and Beaconsfield SYCOB.

Nicknamed ‘The Ton’, Bitton AFC is managed by Andy Black. Black has been at the club since October 2006 and has had previous managerial experience with Cadbury Heath, Mangotsfield (where he spent most of his playing career) and Frome Town. Black took Frome to the FA Vase Quarter-Finals in 2004-05; a not insignificant FA Vase pedigree.

Bitton AFC it is then, one month on from now. We had to wait a while before we found out where the next leg of this journey would take us. And while all is now clear, the local media in Bristol have not quite got it right. In this week's 'Bristol Evening Post' it was reported that Bitton face "an FA Vase fourth round clash with Cogenhose United". Someone else who evidently struggled with the research.

Another Away Day

Following Cogenhoe United's 4-1 win at Arundel last Saturday, and before the draw for the Fourth Round Proper on Monday, an amusing entry appeared on the home page of Cogenhoe's website. Under the 'Cup Competitions' fixtures column, it showed the next FA Vase game on 17th January 2009, opponents not yet known, but described as an "Away" tie. This made me chuckle. I doubt whether the webmaster has an ability to see into the future, but on the face of it this appeared to be an extremely confident prediction. And for good reason; 8 out of the last 9 FA Vase ties for Cogenhoe United have been played away from home. Perhaps someone up at the club was trying to tempt fate; or maybe it was just inevitable that they would be on their travels again.

Whatever the reason, the webmsater was right. When the draw was eventually made, Cogenhoe Untited were the second ball out of the hat and will face a trip to either Street or Bitton AFC. The draw had me once again diving onto Google to find out exactly where these two places are. I had heard of Street, but Bitton was another new one on me. Both are out west; Street is in Somerset, south-west of Bath, and Bitton is just outside Bristol. Which ever team prevail, it will be a trip down the M4 for me in the New Year. For Cogenhoe United, it will be a round trip of about 230 miles, and that's if they take the direct cross-country route.

Street and Bitton drew 0-0 in their Third Round Proper game; their replay was scheduled for the Wednesday just gone, but it failed to survive the cold weather. They will try again tomorrow. For me, I'm contemplating a trip up to Peterborough United (v Oldham) with POSH Mate tomorrow, whilst Cogenhoe United wait to find out who their opponents in the next round will be. But there is one thing Cogenhoe United already know for sure about the next round: it will be yet another away day.

Game 6: Arundel 1, Cogenhoe United 4

Third Round Proper ~ Saturday 6th December 2008
Venue: Mill Road, Arundel, Sussex
Attendance: 126

Distance travelled: 103 miles


An impressive first half hat-trick from Cogenhoe United's young forward Darren Frost ultimately finished off Arundel's FA Vase campaign for this season. In a game where the visitors had only a handful of chances, and Arundel spurned many, it was Frost's assured finishing that separated the teams. A rather flattering 4-1 scoreline propelled the Northamptonshire outfit into the Fourth Round Proper.

My journey to Sussex started when I collected my travelling companion PB; it was to be just the two of us for this game, as Mackem had locked herself away with a box of Kleenex after Keano had packed his bags and waved goodbye to Wearside; and POSH Mate had made up some excuse about muck spreading (its a long story). Our journey south did not pass without incident. Just outside Fittleworth I struck a pheasant. Technically, as the bird was in mid-flight, it struck me; well, my car to be precise. I would be surprised if the bird survived the impact. I couldn't help noticing, with its contorted face pressed firmly against the windscreen, its tongue hanging limply from beneath its skewed beak, its legs splayed in an agonisingly unnatural position and its right wing coiled around a wiper blade, that it didn't look too healthy.

Once at Mill Road, we had the pleasure of meeting Cris Jackson and his young son. Cris, it transpired, had also set off last September with a plan to follow the FA Vase all the way to Wembley next May. He had started in the First Round Qualifying in Sussex at the Hassocks v Three Bridges tie, which finished 4-3 to the home side. Cris then went to the Hassocks and Chertsey Town game in the following round, where our paths joined. It also transpired that, at that Chertsey game, both our sons had met when they had played football together, with the turnstiles as goalposts; they both remembered each other. The phrase 'it's a small world' is a bit clichéd, so I won't use it. It was great to meet a kindred spirit (so to speak) and I look forward to meeting Cris again and share this journey with him throughout the next few months.

It certainly turned out to be a day for meeting people. Bob Marchant, the Arundel chairman, once again came over to say "hello" on what was a big day for him and his club. We also met Phil Wright from Cogenhoe United, another fine example of the type of person upon whom clubs at this level rely; Phil is the Programme Editor at Cogenhoe and puts his hand to a whole raft of other voluntary work at the club. His father is the Chairman and his brother coaches the U18 side. A real family affair. At half-time, I also got to meet photographer Terry Buckman who was taking shots at the game. Terry, along with my book publisher David Bauckham, last season published the excellent football-photography book 'A Season of Sussex Soccer', which I commend you all to buy. And before you ask, no, I am not on commission! There is a link to Terry's photos from Saturday's tie at the end of this post.

In amongst all this socialising, there was another good FA Vase game to report on. The outcome hinged on which of the two teams managed to take their chances. Cogenhoe United devoured theirs in splendid fashion, with some quality finishing. By half-time, the visitors were 3-0 up and Darren Frost had chilled the home fans with a wonderful hat-trick.

Frost took only ten minutes to make his mark. Playing as the lone striker, Cogenhoe's plan to hit Frost with the long ball paid dividends. Arundel had won a corner, which was played short and fizzled out to nothing. The resulting long ball up field was expertly brought under control by Frost; he dropped a shoulder and with his second touch pushed the ball a few yards off his marker and curled a delightful shot around and over Alex Bryant into the top right hand corner of the Arundel goal.

If his first goal was good, Frost's second goal was even better. Another long ball found Frost on the edge of the Mullets penalty area; with an exquisite first touch he took possession in his stride and ghosted past a static defender and fired in an excellent low shot across the keeper. 2-0 to Cogenhoe United with only fifteen minutes played.

Cogenhoe had left Northamptonshire at 10 o'clock in the morning, but their long journey seemed to have little impact on the players. It was Arundel who were rather sluggish in the early exchanges, and squandered possession far too easily in an almost panicky response to Cogenhoe's electrifying burst out of the blocks. Arundel's first real chance arrived a couple of minutes after the second goal when they had a shot deflected just wide, with the Cogenhoe goalkeeper, Darren Watts, rooted to the spot. The Arundel bench were suddenly extremely vociferous, and from the opposite side of the pitch there were clearly audible cries of "keep hold of the ball!" and "where's the movement?"

Arundel slowly joined the game. Cogenhoe United were already content to defend deep and in numbers, and this they did very well. A few long shots tested Watts in the visitor's goal, but he showed a safe pair of hands more than once. In an amusing moment, a Cogenhoe player won a clean tackle and in the process sent the referee flying; the refs' fall was theatrically broken by turf as his face made contact with it. I didn't laugh. Not much.

Cogenhoe had a chance to increase their lead on 26 minutes when Tom McGowan had a free and totally unmarked header only yards out, but contrived to direct the ball over the bar. This spurred Arundel on, and almost immediately had what was probably their best chance of the game. Mike Huckett broke clear of the Cooks defence, rounded the keeper and looked certain to score. His shot however was rather rushed, and the feeble effort was cleared off the line by a grateful Lee Gotch. As half-time approached, the home team continued to create chances as they finally kept hold of the ball. Matt Axel dragged a shot wide and then Gary Norgate was slipped in by Howard Neighbour only to see his shot blaze the wrong side of the post, when it seemed easier to hit the target. The home support were already beginning to sense this was not going to be Arundel's day.

As if to prove the point, Cogenhoe scored their third five minutes before the interval and it was fair to say it came against the run of play. Another long ball arrowed up front, found Darren Frost over towards the corner flag with the ball at his feet. Frost stood nonchalantly motionless for a few seconds. As Jason Wimbleton approached, Frost cleverly flicked the ball beyond the Arundel defender with a sudden burst of pace. Wimbleton lunged at Frost's rapidly disappearing ankles and gave away a clear penalty. Wimbleton's club nickname is the 'Silver Fox' but it was Frost who had proved the more cunning. Frost dispatched the resultant spot-kick expertly to claim the match ball.

Half-time: Arundel 0, Darren Frost 3.

This was a game of two halves and in the second period Arundel threw the kitchen sink at Cogenhoe. I actually lost count of the chances the home team had to score, many of which were good chances to say the least. Their passing was far more assured and they controlled the game. On 57 minutes, Arundel won a free kick on the left and from Matt Axell's cross Gary Norgate got his head to the ball to reduce the deficit.

But for the home team, that's as good as it got. Five minutes after Norgate's goal, Josh Biggs produced a fine run down the left, only to shoot over once inside the area. Three minutes on from that, Mike Huckett headed over from a matter of yards. With 68 minutes on the clock, Gary Norgate should have doubled his tally when he was put through, only to force a fine save from Watts. Arundel continued to press, and Cogenhoe were now on the back foot. As the clock ticked down, more chances came and went, the most notable on 80 minutes when Watts in the Cogenhoe goal pulled off another fine save, this time from Richard Ghent.

The sucker-punch for Arundel arrived on 87 minutes when Cogenhoe broke and their substitute Dan Holman - who looked about twelve years old - floated in a shot from outside the area over a rather exposed Alex Bryant: 4-1 to the visitors, and it was all over for Arundel.

This match was another good advert for non League football. It is now time for me to say "goodbye" to Arundel as Cogenhoe United take up the FA Vase baton. As the game on Saturday drew to a conclusion, Arundel castle stood majestically silhouetted in the half-moon light of a freezing cold Sussex evening. I and my friends have received warm welcomes on both our visits to the wonderful setting of Arundel Football Club, and I wish them well for the remainder of the season. Hopefully, that will not be the last time I get to see Arundel play.

Based on Saturday's performance, I doubt this is the last we will hear of Darren Frost. Remember the name.

Terry Buckman's photos
More of my, rather inferior, photos

It's A Wrap

It's been a very busy few days, what with my birthday (hurtling towards 30) and preparations for Christmas. I have always had the feeling that being born in early December has been an inconvenience, not least to my wife who is the first to admit that until my birthday is "out of the way" can she then, and only then, concentrate on festive readiness.

She does have a point. For the last few days I have been smothered by a deluge of wrapping paper and gift tags, either opening presents or wrapping them. In a blur of paper, ribbon and sticky tape I am sure that I have, at least once, wrapped one of my newly opened birthday offerings in Lego Star Wars Christmas Paper by mistake; heaven only knows what my son's junior school friend will make of his 30 year old bottle of port.

The game tomorrow at Arundel will therefore come as some relief for me, a bit of an escape from all the Dazzle Wrap. It will be my second visit to the lovely town in Sussex this season, after watching Arundel's 1-0 victory over Chertsey Town back in early October; 'The Mullets' of Arundel will host 'The Cooks' of Cogenhoe United in an FA Vase Third Round Proper clash.

Both sides are in good form. Arundel go into the tie, with a place in the last 32 up for grabs, off the back of only one defeat in 14 games. Cogenhoe United have lost once in their last 11 outings.

It is difficult to predict what the turnout for the game will be. The average attendance from the five games I have been to in this season's FA Vase is 76, with only one (at Hassocks) over 100. Interest in the competition is sure to swell as the business end approaches, and I guess that from the national stages after Christmas attendances will start to rise. I have only just found out the attendance from the game at Banstead Athletic in the last round. Conspicuous by its absence from the FA website (and in many other sources) I ended up dropping the FA an email to ask. Yesterday I received a rather curt reply that "the attendance was 62". At around the same time their website was updated.

But as for tomorrow? I know that Cogenhoe United estimate something in the region of 30 will travel down from Northamptonshire, so we may see a gate pushing 100. Unfortunately, there will be some fans of both teams who will, I'm sure, be unable to find the excuses to avoid the Saturday afternoon trip to buy Christmas presents. In a desperate and fruitless attempt to avoid sounding sexist, I don't mind declaring that I am happy to do the Christmas shopping. But not on a Saturday afternoon. I know where I'd much rather be.

Passionate People, Passionate Places

I am off to Newcastle. Off to the North East of England whose regional image campaign a few years ago declared that this corner of our nation is bursting at the seams with "Passionate People, Passionate Places". I have never been to Newcastle and I feel rather ashamed to admit that I have only ever been to the North East once, and that was last season on my FA Cup trail when I visited Teesside for the Middlesbrough v Cardiff City Quarter-Final tie. My brother has just moved there, so we have a family orientated trip up the East Coast line which will start at the crack of dawn tomorrow.

I regret to say that I am unlikely to get the opportunity to dip my toe into the ocean of non League football that the region has to offer. Family breaks away are great, especially when visiting a new place. But this kind of trip always comes burdened with awkward, uncomfortable thoughts that dart in and out of the mind. The sort of thoughts that jostle for attention and create a heady and uneasy mix. These sort of thoughts: 'too good an opportunity to miss' and 'maybe I could pop out for a couple of hours' jumbled up with 'my life would not be worth living' and 'that'll be me sleeping on the sofa tonight then'. A couple of days, away with wife and child, will be dedicated family time. Time that does not allow for an afternoon stood on a terrace bank, sheltered against the elements, admiring dug-outs or floodlight pylons. The old escape routine of "I'm just popping out for a pint of milk dear" is quite frankly a disaster waiting to happen. Has anyone ever used that and got away with it?

I'm struggling to convince myself that this will not unduly concern me on this weekend away. When I started this FA Vase journey a few months back, I felt that the chance of me visiting the North East for a game was high. Don't ask me why; nothing based on fact or logic, another one of those lower abdomen feelings that probably owes more to a dodgy Chicken Jalfrezi rather than one's own stomach actually being able to predict what's going to happen. Gut feelings are great, but are only quoted when that one-in-a-million chance is realised and a huge bucket of hindsight is at hand. But yes, I had a gut feeling that I would end up in the North East for an FA Vase game this season.

I used the past tense there though. I am gradually realising that this is an unlikely likelihood. I guess my original train of thought was fuelled by the unquestionable fact that football teams from the North East have, historically, fared well in the FA Vase and, more strikingly, in its predecessor competition, the FA Amateur Cup.

Teams from the North East who have excelled in the FA Vase include Bedlington Terriers, Guisborough Town, Newcastle Blue Star, Tow Law Town and Whitley Bay. But it is in the FA Amateur Cup where the reputation of a strong and vibrant non League football scene in the region was surely founded. Teams from the North East have won the competition a remarkable 21 times in 71 seasons, and this being a national competition mind. That's an almost 30% success rate. Bishop Auckland led the way with 10 wins. Roll off the tongue some of the other North East winners and they are recognisable names in the football world, even to those fans who barely look lower than the foot of the Premiership; Crook Town, North Shields, Stockton and West Auckland to name a few.

But doubts about whether the North East will call me for a Vase game this season are creeping in through the side door. Looking at the list of teams that remain in the competition, the representation from the region is not as large as I would have predicted. Still in there are Spennymoor Town, Marske United, Shildon, Whitley Bay, and Dunston Federation. Not many really; other recognisable names such as Billingham Synthonia, Chester-le-Street Town, Consett and Sunderland Nissan have already fallen by the wayside.

So I'm not as hopeful as I was at the start of the season. After the Third Round Proper, the competition opens up into the national rounds which means I could end up in any part of the country. Deep down, I really do want a trip to the North East but in reality I see that possibility stumbling clumsily over the distant horizon. This weekend's journey there may be the last for some time. If you listen carefully, you can hear a golden opportunity ringing that side door bell. Trouble is, I won't be able to answer it. As we travel on the train tomorrow I will be telling my wife about the passionate places that await us, and the passionate people occupying those places, but at the same time trying desperately hard not to include the words "Morpeth Town versus Ashington" in the same sentence. It won't be easy.

Cogenhoe United

The FA Vase is now down to the last 32 ties, and my sixth game in this season's competition will see me make a welcome return trip down to Arundel. The draw for the Third Round Proper paired Arundel with Cogenhoe United:

[tie 21] 06 Dec 2008 15:00 Arundel v Cogenhoe United

Cogenhoe village is five miles east of Northampton and sits on high land overlooking the River Nene valley. Cogenhoe United play in the Premier Division of the United Counties League (step 5 in the pyramid); the alarming thing for me is that this club is younger than I am! Established in 1967 they play at Compton Park in the village and the ground boasts a 5,000 capacity. The village Cricket Club also plays at Compton Park, who sub-lets the playing area from the football club, who in turn leases the land from the Compton Estates of Castle Ashby.

In their short history they joined United Counties League 1 in 1985-86 and were promoted to the Premier after finishing runners-up the following season. They have been ever present in this League ever since, and claimed the title in 2004-05. Unfortunately, they were not promoted to step 4 of the pyramid as their ground failed to meet regulations.

Cogenhoe United have a reasonable FA Vase record; on three separate occasions they have reached the Fourth Round Proper; in 1993-93 they lost to Oadby Town, in 1996-97 Mossley ended their interest and most recently in 2006-07 their run was halted by Causeway United. To get to this stage of the current FA Vase campaign, they have seen off Langford, Codicote (with an impressive 6-0 scoreline) and Boston Town.

The best run in the FA Cup came in 2005-06 when they reached the Third Qualifying Round, where they lost 4-3 at Chasetown after a 1-1 draw at Compton Park. That was the season that Chasetown went on to meet Oldham Athletic in the First Round Proper.

The club, who have a local rivalry with Northampton Spencer, is managed by Darren Collins. Collins was a prolific striker whilst at Rushden & Diamonds, who he signed for in 1994, joining the Northamptonshire outfit from Enfield. In the 1995-96 season he bagged 40 goals and two seasons later his tally was 35; in a six year spell at Nene Park he scored a total of 153 goals, which remains a Rushden & Diamonds club record. Collins went on to play for Kettering Town, and a number of other clubs including Cogenhoe United. He took up the manager's role at Cogenhoe in 2007.

I realise now that for the first few days after the draw was made I was mispronouncing the name of the team. Cogenhoe is pronounced "cook-no" rather than "cog-n-ho"; this explains their club nickname of 'The Cooks' and also explains why I was getting strange looks whenever I mentioned the game and Arundel's opposition. At least I think that was the reason why.

Game 5: Banstead Atheltic 1, Arundel 2 (aet)

Second Round Proper ~ Saturday 15th November 2008
Venue: Merland Rise, Tadworth, Surrey
Attendance: 62

Distance travelled: 49 miles

I'm glad I don't bet too much on the outcome of football matches. Saturday's enthralling encounter at Merland Rise is the type of game that crops up every once in a while. The sort of game where the odds are so heavily stacked in the favour of one team that, surely, there could only ever be one outcome; but events then unfold to prove that there is no such thing as a 'certainty' in football. Something we have all known for a long time, but every now and again a gentle reminder does no harm.

The contrary recent fortunes for both these clubs had led me to believe that it was going to be a tough afternoon for the home side. Arundel went into Saturday's FA Vase game on the back of eight straight wins in a row; Banstead Athletic had lost all bar one of their first team players in the wake of Dave Leworthy's resignation as manager. Before a ball had even been kicked, I was fairly confident that I could predict the outcome. Twenty minutes into the game I had seen nothing to suggest that my confidence was misplaced; I feared that Banstead would be comprehensively played off the park and were heading for what is known in the trade as a 'tonking'.

As it turned out, Arundel ultimately left this part of Surrey with a win, a place in the Third Round Proper and nice cheque for £1200 courtesy of the FA. But it was far from as straightforward as I had envisaged. In the end, it would be fair to say that they pipped Banstead on the line by a short head, but needed extra-time to do so. The fact that this was a great game was due, in no small part, to the turn of events on the pitch that saw Banstead still in the game right at the death. It would also be fair to say, if I had put my money where my mouth was, I would have lost my house, my car and probably the shirt on my back.

Banstead struggled to get into the game in the first half. From the off Arundel completely dominated possession, and the makeshift Banstead team, still getting to know each other after being assembled in a matter of weeks, failed to string more than a couple of passes together. 'The Mullets' from Sussex looked stronger, quicker and far more composed on the ball than their hosts; they squandered a number of scoring opportunities and a half-time scoreline of 3- or 4-nil in their favour would not have been flattering.

Arundel had the ball in the net after only 4 minutes, but the 'goal' was disallowed. Moments later they won a corner from which Josh Biggs shot wide from only a few yards. Arundel controlled the early exchanges, which were also typified by strong, firm challenges from both teams. This was an important game for either side, and both sets of players were keen to make their presence felt. The referee however failed to enter into the spirit of the occasion and spent much of the first half with his whistle to his lips; not for the first time on this FA Vase run the man in the middle quickly became the centre of attention, but for all the wrong reasons. A shout of "look at me, I've got the whistle" from one spectator quite aptly summed up the feelings of the crowd.

Arundel carried on bossing the game right up to half-time, seemingly unaffected by the referee’s frequent interventions. On 20 minutes, they had a shot cleared off the line, on the half-hour mark a second 'goal' disallowed and 38 minutes in Biggs blazed over the bar when it seemed easier to score. In amongst the Arundel chances I lost count of the number of yellow cards issued; at one stage I believe it was Banstead with five bookings and Arundel with two.

In a not particularly dirty game, the referee set a dangerous precedent with an early Banstead booking - Scott Murphy was shown a yellow for a strong challenge on the edge of his own area after only 17 minutes - and he then proceeded to reach for his pocket with gay abandon. Some of the bookings were unfortunately for dissent; the most memorable was Banstead's Russell Townsend, who repeatedly swore at the ref after the award of a free-kick to Arundel. To give the referee some credit, he gave Townsend plenty of opportunity to walk away; the referee, more than once, made it quite clear to Townsend that he would tolerate no more swearing: "Swear at me one more time, and I'll book you". Cue torrent of abuse from Townsend. "This is your last chance" replied the ref. "F*** off" said Townsend. He only had himself to blame.

Against all the odds the teams went in goalless, no doubt much to the relief of the Banstead players and officials. When I say "went in", the players left the pitch to find themselves locked out of the changing rooms and spent a few minutes queuing in the cold waiting for a key to be found. In what was a rather comical incident (in a sad sort of way), it crossed my mind to take a photo of the bemused teams to post here. I thought better of it, and scurried off to the warmth of the clubhouse.

Or should I say boardroom, which is where we were invited to at half-time. I attended the game with PB and our welcome at Merland Rise was first class. We had started the day by taking a tortuous route to Banstead's ground by way of Hampton Court, Hinchley Wood, Chessington, Ewell, Cheam, and Sutton. We were not lost, but were on the quest to visit PB's Mum, which turned out to be a wise move as the prize on offer at the end of the circuitous meander through Surrey suburbia took the form of a fresh pot of coffee and a pork pie. In my humble opinion, there is nothing finer than a pre-match pastry, as many of my friends can testify. Therein lays a completely different, and not at all interesting, story.

Before the kick-off, we had met the new Banstead manager Graeme Banyard who was genuinely pleased to talk to us. We were introduced to committee member Eddy Adams, who kindly escorted us (at half-time) to Banstead's boardroom, resplendent in its display of trophies and pennants, allowing us to meet some of the officials. A splendid cuppa in one hand and a digestive in the other, we got to meet Terry Parmenter (Banstead's secretary). The unconditional hospitality was a real bonus for us and we both learnt a little more about the club. It was also nice to once again meet the Arundel chairman, Bob Marchant; having now spoken to a number of officials from most of the teams that I have so far encountered on this FA Vase run, it is crystal clear just what this competition means to teams at this level. The FA Vase is important.

Back to the game, and the second half began how it had ended, with Arundel having won a free-kick, a corner and had a chance to score (Matt Huckett heading over) all within 10 minutes of the re-start. But then, just as it seemed that Banstead were simply buying time against a tide of inevitability, the game somehow changed. I'm not really sure what happened; maybe Banstead had received a real grilling at half-time? Perhaps Arundel took their collective feet of the gas? Possibly the Banstead players had found some self-belief? Whatever the reason, the home team started to string some passes together, keep hold of the ball and against all odds began to grind their way back into the game. It was more than obvious that this shocked the Arundel players; you could hear their frustration as they realised that their total dominance for a large chunk of the game may not actually yield anything. On the hour mark Banstead produced a good move down the right that culminated with a shot which went the wrong side of the post by a matter of inches. A couple of minutes later, Alex Bryant in the Arundel goal fumbled a cross out for a Banstead corner. Arundel were now rattled, and Banstead's confidence was on the up.

And so, rather ironically, it was somewhat against the run of the second half play that Arundel took the lead. Matt Axell sent in a testing cross from the left onto the head of Mike Huckett (Matt's brother) at the far post to put the visitors 1-0 up after 65 minutes. Before the goal, Arundel had brought on Richard Ghent, a speedy winger who started to give the Banstead left back a torrid time. Following the goal, Arundel routed most of their play through Ghent and once again, I was sure that Arundel would add to their lead and win comfortably.

Cue the Banstead equaliser on 75 minutes. After a scramble in the Arundel box, Louis Hollingsworth reacted quickest to turn the ball beyond the visiting keeper. The game had turned again, and now Banstead were pushing for the winner. The Arundel players were by now urging each other to "calm down" as their controlled style of play had seemingly deserted them. As both teams tired, the last fifteen minutes was a joy to watch as vast amounts of space opened up across the pitch and either team could have snatched a winner in an end-to-end finish to the game. Banstead came closest with five minutes remaining when Luke Edghill forced a marvellous save from Bryant.

But 1-1 it remained at full-time, so spilling the tie into extra-time. Banstead had the first chance to take the lead in this period when Jason Hannington struck a wonderful effort from 30 yards out, arrowed towards the top corner of the goal. Somehow Bryant produced another fantastic save to turn the ball around the post. Just as it looked like Banstead might now take the game, it was Arundel who regained the lead. On 98 minutes, Howard Neighbour scored a fine goal, thumping the ball into the roof of the net from short range. Banstead still had time to equalise and forced a number of corners but, in the end, they came up short. Their frustration at facing an exit from the competition boiled over in a frenetic last few moments of the game, with Lee Matthews receiving a second yellow and then Jason Haniff two quick bookings in the space of a minute. The tie for Banstead, now reduced to nine men, was over.

Wow. All of this for a £5 entry fee. A great game; great hospitality from Banstead Athletic and another great afternoon in the company of non League football. We rounded off our first ever visit to Merland Rise with a quick drink in the boardroom, a brief chat with Graeme Banyard about his plans for Banstead for the rest of the season and then off and away from the ground feeling very happy that we had been part of another chapter in this season's FA Vase story.

One thing is for sure; I'm already looking forward to the Third Round Proper in December and wherever the draw takes me, I'll certainly be there. You can bet on it.

Photo Gallery 1 [more of my shots]
Photo Gallery 2 [courtesy of Simon Roe, Copyright © Simon Roe 2008]

Baby, It's Cold Outside

Does anyone remember the classic 80's US sitcom 'Cheers'? It was a favourite of mine, and there is an exchange from one scene that I often quote that still makes me laugh two decades on. One of the characters was Norm Peterson, otherwise referred to as 'Big Norm', who was played by the actor George Wendt. In the show he was renowned for his one liners. On one occasion he enters the 'Cheers' bar preceded by a flurry of snow blown in off the wintry Boston streets. As he enters, one of the 'Cheers' regulars perched at the bar shouts over "Hey Norm! What's up?" to which Norm replies "My nipples, it's freezing outside!" I've lost count of the number of times I've rolled this one out. I'd like to apologise here and now to all my family and friends.

There is some relevance to this story. At last, the Banstead Athletic v Arundel tie is within sight, only a few days away now. I mentioned in an earlier post that Merland Rise, the venue for Saturday, has a reputation as being a very cold ground to stand in. I fear it could be very cold this coming weekend. It was only two rounds ago that we were standing in glorious sunshine at the FA Vase tie between Hassocks and Chertsey Town, with short sleeved shirts, basking in the last flickers of a fading summer. And in the blink of an eye, the weather turned, the clocks went back, the days got shorter and darker and all of a sudden it feels very cold. As Dean Martin sang, "Baby, It's Cold Outside".

At the weekend a friend accused me of having lived for far too long in the south and I had become a "southern wuss". I think she is right. I seem to feel the cold much more than I used to. I know, I know; it's probably an age thing. That week in Devon I spent with my family a few weeks back was bitterly cold, with a biting sea wind playing its part. When subsequently asked "how was your holiday" the words "cold", "chilly" or "freezing" invariably crept into the first sentence of any of my replies. I guess it serves us right for having our summer holiday in October.

In the seemingly mammoth gap between the First and Second Rounds of this FA Vase competition, I have satiated my thirst for football with a few other games. Last weekend I took my son to see the top-of-the-table Ryman League Premier Division clash between Staines Town and Dover Athletic. He had a free entry voucher, a commendable scheme run by Staines Town whereby vouchers are given away to local schools. An entertaining game, in which Dover grabbed a 90th minute winner to chalk up a 3-2 win and in doing so, cemented their position at the summit of the League. But it was cold. We are now at the stage of the season where several layers are loaded on; a t-shirt, a long sleeved shirt, a thick jumper, a fleece, a jacket. Hat. Gloves. Not quite the weather for thermal leggings, but that is not far off I'm sure. I was so bulked up at the game I occupied two seats in the small Wheatsheaf Park stand.

The following day, I headed off to Essex for the FA Cup tie between AFC Hornchurch and Peterborough United with Mackem and POSH Mate. The forecast was once again for low temperatures, so I went armed with layers of clothing. After a warming Full English breakfast in Upminster, we walked a couple of miles to the ground. By the time we reached 'The Stadium' I was feeling kind of toasted; the sun then came out and I began to regret being cocooned in so much cotton and wool. But the moment the sun retreated behind the clouds, that arctic cold snuck back in. The match itself was poor; played against a strong wind blowing the length of the pitch, it was never going to be a classic. In a game of little incident, Peterborough snatched victory at the death when the Hornchurch goalkeeper, Dale Brightly, spilled an innocuous looking long range shot to present Craig Mackail-Smith with a simple tap in. The Hornchurch players collapsed in disbelief at the mistake just when a deserved replay at London Road looked likely. One couldn't help feel for the young keeper; an inconsolable Brightly left out in the cold.

So welcome to British winter football; several months of cold and rain and frost and damp and snow await. My thermal leggings may just make the first appearance of the season for the trip to Banstead on Saturday. The danger being that I could end up sweating like a pig, which is another thing 'Big Norm' was known to do:

Norm: "I have, on several occasions, been known to perspire a bit."
Carla: "We could grow rice."