A Cod, A Cow Bell And A Pie Hut

There is a rather peculiar, and extremely unbelievable, story doing the rounds this morning. I heard it on the radio at breakfast, and it is about a mobile phone that was found in the belly of a 25lb cod. A chap from Worthing, Sussex, lost his phone whilst walking his dog on the beach and it turned up a few weeks later, still in working order, inside a fish which had been caught by a local trawlerman. The phone and owner were reunited when the fisherman phoned a couple of numbers to trace the owner.

This kind of story surfaces every now and again, and I have to take it with a pinch of salt (no pun intended); the only national newspaper running this story is 'The Sun', so therein lies a clue to its authenticity. These are stories of chance; the 'million-to-one' occurrence. The pensioner reunited with his false teeth after losing them 25 years ago; the chance meeting of a long lost brother whilst on holiday in Outer Mongolia; that oil painting you picked up at the local car boot sale for a fiver which was actually painted by your Grandfather's Grandfather a couple of centuries ago. People generally love these stories and use them as evidence that there are 'other forces' moulding and shaping our lives. Luck, chance, fate; whatever you want to call it.

Of course, what makes them sound spectacular is that they are reported widely, discussed, passed on, talked about and devoured with relish. The stories gather a momentum of their own. What isn't reported are the 999,999 other times that this kind of thing doesn't happen.

I have felt for a few weeks now that fate has dealt me a very kind hand. I'm off to Glossop tomorrow, my place of birth, to watch North End take on Marske United. I am so excited about going back to Glossop, you just wouldn't believe; since the draw was made, I have often found myself saying "what were the chances of that happening" or "I can't quite believe that I've ended up at Glossop". Having no control whatsoever where this FA Vase journey would take me, I'm still pinching myself that it is sending me, rather excitedly, towards my home town.

513 teams entered the FA Vase this season, so the likelihood of me going to Glossop is not really a 'million-to-one' chance. But its not only a '513-to-one' chance either, because many other factors have a bearing. Regionalised earlier rounds meant that I would only see teams from down South in the early stages; the chances of seeing Glossop were naturally much slimmer than, say, Banstead Athletic. Glossop still had to go and win their regional games to get to this Quarter-Final, against some very strong Northern teams. But for me to see them at Surrey Street, they did have to be drawn out of the hat at home, after already being put on my 'path' of the draw when they were drawn to face Bitton AFC in the last round. So the chances of me ending up at Surrey Street, tomorrow, were rather slim.

But looking at all the entrants to this season's competition, I may well be writing the same thing if I had happened across some other teams on my way to Wembley. AFC Blackpool and AFC Fylde (I spent 3 years at polytechnic in the Fylde and Blackpool area); Wick (as in 'Wick To Wembley' from last season); Runcorn Linnets (where by brother used to live); Morpeth Town (near to where by brother now lives); Newton Abbot (where my sister lives); New Milton Town (where my family holiday every year)...and so on. A visit to any of those and the now worn out phrase of "what were the chances of that" would have been aired yet again.

Who knows? One thing I do know is that it promises to be a great occasion tomorrow. We are down to the last 8 teams already, only two more rounds to negotiate before a Wembley appearance.

Preparations up at Glossop have been ongoing all week. A large crowd is expected as recruitment efforts around the town and High Peak are stepped up; an extra turnstile will be open, the clubhouse (opening at 1pm) now has a temporary extension to house everyone and the number of programmes being printed has increased tenfold compared to a normal League game. Fans are being encouraged to bring flags and drums and make as much noise as possible. Likewise with the Marske United fans; they will be bringing at least one drum, a bugle and a cow bell. Yes, a cow bell.

It sounds as if there will be a great atmosphere in Surrey Street. A couple of rounds ago, Glossop dramatically beat Stewarts & Lloyds Corby with a very late winner and the 'old fashioned' atmosphere inside the ground that day was, by all accounts, fantastic. The defeated Northamptonshire club later wrote to Glossop to thank them for their marvellous hospitality and also to say that was one of the best games, for atmosphere, they had have ever played in.

The Glossop players have also been given time to prepare for the game. The Vodkat North West Counties League allowed them to postpone a scheduled midweek fixture ahead of tomorrow's match. Meanwhile, Marske United didn't have that luxury and had a tough game on Wednesday, winning 3-2 at Birtley Town after being 2-0 down. The Glossop players will run out a little fresher.

And finally, one great piece of news for me is that Glossop will have a Pie Hut at the game tomorrow. For someone who loves his pies, I'm delighted. I don't recall ever going to a ground that has had something called a 'Pie Hut'. Wonderful. What were the chances of that happening? I'm off now to phone my friends to pass on this excellent news. Now, where did I put my mobile...?

Mind Games?

Last Saturday Bitton AFC beat Radstock Town 3-0 in a League game, all the goals scored in the second half. In the crowd was the Glossop North End manager Steve Young. His side's game that day against St Helens Town had fallen victim to the High Peaks inclement weather, and he took the opportunity to cast an eye over his FA Vase opposition. I was mildly surprised to hear what he had to say following his visit. He explained "I was happy with what I saw on the day" and went on to say that "We will cause them more problems than they will cause us". He said that he had seen nothing about Bitton to worry him and was confident that Glossop would win the tie.

Call me on old cynic, but that's a pretty brave statement. I cannot claim to know much about Steve Young, other than the fact he took over at Glossop at the start of the 2007-08 season and had a relatively successful first season in charge of the Derbyshire club, finishing seventh in the North West Counties Premier League. There are a number of ways his words could be construed. One: he really is extremely confident and he knows his players well enough to genuinely believe that there was nothing he saw at Bitton that unduly concerns him. Two: he is naive. Three: he is playing mind games.

Young has every reason to be confident. His side are currently fourth in the League having lost only 5 games in 21. They have had an excellent FA Vase campaign already this season, having eliminated Sporting Khalsa (5-0), Calverton Miners Welfare (4-1 away), New Mills (also 4-1 away), Biddulph Victoria (4-0), Winterton Rangers (2-1) and Stewarts & Lloyds Corby in the last round (2-1). 21 goals in 6 FA Vase ties are enough to inspire confidence in any manager. But Bitton are also riding high in their own League (3 points off top spot with 6 games in hand) and have had an impressive FA Vase run, as previously reported on this blog. But where does the boundary lie between extreme confidence and naivety?

Naive managers don't last long in football and in a League as competitive as the North West Counties Premier Division, that sort of character trait would not be tolerated by boards and fans alike. Naive managers simply have no place to hide. Young will know it is difficult to fully assess a team on the back of only one viewing. A 3-0 scoreline suggested a comfortable result for Bitton last Saturday. Maybe the Gloucestershire club had the luxury of being able to take their collective feet off the gas? Maybe Bitton had players out injured or rested and their strongest team was not on show?

Cometh the day, cometh the man, and it could all be very different on February 7th. Teams can raise their game to an almost unrecognisable level for Cup encounters, as if we need reminding. In last season's FA Cup, just think of Chasetown, Horsham, Staines Town, Havant & Waterlooville, Oldham and Barnsley. Against Radstok Town, Bitton had a crowd of 108. Expect triple that for the Glossop tie and a bigger crowd could influence proceedings. The pitch could play its part if there is rain before the tie. 'The Hillmen' will be making their long journey down from Derbyshire on the day, with no overnight stay the day before, and the journey could take its toll. Glossop could quite simply have an off day. It happens. Young will know all of these things and I hold no truck with the naivety explanation.

So mind games perhaps? If that really is the case, it's an awfully dangerous game to play. The national press love to report on the mind games of the Premier League managers. The comments of Ferguson, Mourinho and Scolari, Wenger and most recently Benitez are scrutinised, dissected, butchered and quartered to the nth degree. And the managers know this and use it to their advantage so much so that it has become a part of the job description. Mind games employed by the masters can wield amazing effect; the classic Keegan rant being probably the most famous.

But these kind of mind games can often backfire. The Bitton AFC manager will no doubt be letting his players know exactly what the opposition thinks about them. This could spur the team on and the comments could fuel Bitton with even more of an incentive to win the game. Comments pinned on dressing room walls can really galvanise a team and focus the mind, particularly if those comments are less than favourable.

The proof, as they say, will be in the pudding and we have to wait just over a week before we get to see the players on the pitch do the talking. Both Bitton and Glossop are at a similar level and my own view is that there will be little between them on the day. It was Wednesday when I heard Young's confident claims, but today it's a slightly different tone for the Glossop gaffer. Young is now quoted as saying “We’re going to have to be at our best to beat them, put it that way, because they’re a tidy outfit". More mind games or realisation that his midweek comments needed diluting?

In the meantime, the Bitton boss Andy Black remains quiet. When it comes to games of the mind, it is perhaps Black's silence that speaks volumes.

Bitton, Glossop and Mumbai

I saw a good film this week, ‘Slumdog Millionaire’ the acclaimed flick from director Danny Boyle. It is set in Mumbai and is the story of how an 18 year old orphan from the slums is only one question away from winning the top prize on the Indian version of ‘Who Wants To Be A Millionaire’. It really is a great watch, and the main thrust of the story is all about fate. Or Destiny. Or to use a line from the film: some things are "just meant to be". If you already haven’t seen it, I highly recommend it.

I’m not sure if I have ever believed in fate, that your life is already mapped out for you. I think I would like to believe, if only for the reason that it has a fanciful appeal that mocks any sort of logical explanation. But a couple of things have happened recently that have made me think twice. This time last week I did a short post ahead of the FA Vase game between Bitton AFC and Cogenhoe United. In that piece I wrote about my home town, Glossop, and mentioned their tie with Stewarts & Lloyds Corby. I was prompted to bring that up because I had seen that the FA Vase had been in Glossop ahead of their game.

Roll forward one week, and it’s been quite an exciting few days. On the Saturday, Bitton edged out Cogenhoe 2-1, whilst Glossop North End overcame their Northamptonshire opponents by the same score, but in a far more dramatic fashion. Glossop’s winner arrived deep into injury time to the delight of a packed Surrey Street. There is an excellent write-up of that game here from 'Sticky Palms'.

The draw for the Fifth Round Proper (down to the last 8 ties now) produced its own little bit of magic for me; Bitton AFC was pulled out of the hat with a home tie against...Glossop North End! Fate? To say I am excited about the draw is a bit of an understatement. I’m fit to burst and I have thought of little else all week.

And then news later in the week that the FA are taking the Vase on its countrywide tour to Bitton on the day of the game (7th February) and it will be on display in the Bitton clubhouse prior to the match. This is unusual, as the Vase is normally on view to the public in the weekdays preceding the tie. Ordinarily, I would not therefore have seen it, so the fact that the Vase will be at Bitton on the matchday is a real bonus. This will add a touch of luster to what promises to be quite a special day.

Last week I explained how the FA Vase gets very little mention in the media. As if to prove me wrong, we got back from Gloucestershire last Saturday to see the Sky Sports News banner scrolling across the bottom of POSH Mate's TV screen with all the FA Vase scores, including the results from Bitton and Glossop. Shows what I know. But then, quite bizarrely, that same evening, the FA website declared that the game at Glossop had been postponed and did so again in a report on some of the other Fourth Round ties the following day. Beggars belief really, but don’t get me started on the FA.

As for another big media institution, the BBC, well… I think someone in their football office has been reading my blog. Late last Friday they published a mini news item about the exact two games I featured on my blog that same day and the words “chase FA Vase” appear in the title of their piece. Coincidence? Do you think I should sue?

Anyway, back to Bitton AFC v Glossop. What a great draw. Bitton are thrilled with another home tie, and both sides know that there are no easy games left. The Glossop fans are engrossed in the competition and, although this presents a round trip of 370 miles, plans are already underway for booking and filling coaches, note the plural. First impressions suggest that the away support could reach triple figures and Bitton will also attract a good home crowd, with the visit of the Vase providing even more of a pull.

I really can’t wait for this Fifth Round game, the countdown has begun. In the meantime, I’ll be twiddling my thumbs and passing the time with other matches (including my son's debut for Chertsey Town Juniors this Sunday) and no doubt the odd movie or two. There seems to be a number of good films on general release at the moment, I can't decide what to see next; I might even go and watch ‘Slumdog’ again. I know - I'll let fate decide.

Whisper It Quietly

I was born in Glossop, Derbyshire. Many people think that I come from Yorkshire or my accent defines me as a Lancastrian or a Mancunian, even friends who have known me for years. Glossop is a small market town, tucked away on the edge of the High Peak in the Derbyshire Dales. With a history defined by the woollen and cotton industries, there remains evidence of its past; as you drive down off the Peak on the Snake Pass from Buxton and Sheffield, it is the large old mills that still frame the town and provides clues to its origins. Generations of my family have grown up in Glossop, and although I only spent a few years of my early life there, I harbour an unexplained affinity for the place.

The FA Vase went to Glossop this week. The trophy travels the country as part of the FA's media campaign to promote the competition, and it was on show at the town's football club ahead of their Fourth Round tie tomorrow. Glossop North End FC has a rich history; they are former members of the Football League (1898 to 1915) and have reached the Quarter-Finals of the FA Cup (1909). At the time the club's chairman and benefactor was Sir Samuel Hill-Wood who would eventually become chairman of Arsenal. You may recognise the family name and its present day association with the famous North London club.

For Glossop, the arrival of the trophy heightened the levels of excitement surrounding tomorrow's match and has shone the spotlight, for a short while, on the old mill town. Glossop North End welcomes Stewarts & Lloyds Corby to their Surrey Street ground and the club is confident of progressing further in the competition. I'm sure that their Northamptonshire visitors will have a say and will be fuelled by their own, comparable, hopes and expectations.

And that goes for each and every club still in the competition. Up and down the country tomorrow, 32 non League teams will be battling it out on their quest to take one step closer to Wembley. Not that it has made headline news mind. The FA Vase rarely pricks the national conscience, certainly not until the Semis or the Final, and even then a paragraph or two deep within the sports pages is just about all the coverage that the competition gets. Big games for small clubs, and while the football media will be honing in on the events at the Premier League grounds of Stamford Bridge, the KC Stadium and the Reebok, and on Kaka's 'will he, won't he' drama, there will be plenty of grassroots FA Vase tension and excitement in small communities across the land, from Bideford to Bootle and Coalville to Christchurch.

Whilst Stewarts & Lloyds Corby will be flying the Northamptonshire flag up in my town of birth, my current FA Vase team, Cogenhoe Untied, also from Northamptonshire, will be doing likewise in a small village just outside Bristol. Bitton awaits and I'm really looking forward to it. I am reliably informed that the locals are well and truly up for the game. A large crowd is expected at The Recreation Ground and I am told that supporters from some of the bigger local teams are passing up going to watch their own team in favour of coming along to support Bitton. This really is the business end of the competition; four more wins (including a two-legged Semi-Final) and the doors to Wembley open. The prize money on offer for winners of this round is £1,500 and pouring that amount of money into the club coffers will put a smile on many a chairman's face. As Saturday afternoon fades into Saturday evening, there will be joy and celebration for many, but heartache for others.

Neither Bitton AFC nor Cogenhoe United have played many games of late, what with the British weather having its say. Bitton's last League game was on Boxing Day, but they have managed to fit in a Gloucestershire County Cup game this week (a 3-0 win at Harrow Hill) which has given the team a well-needed run out. Likewise, Cogenhoe's last League game was at the end of December and they arranged a friendly midweek as preparation, a 0-0 home draw with Rushden & Higham. Although you may not read it on the back pages of the nationals, nor will it get a mention on BBC, SKY or Setanta, mark my words; this competition means a lot to these clubs and preparations have been meticulous. The Cup tie in South Gloucestershire promises to be a mouth-watering affair.

A source at Bitton explained this to me this week:

"The club directors and fans are seeing this game as possibly the biggest in the club's short history".

I'm sure this sentiment is echoed around the country, but please whisper it quietly. This can be our own little secret.